SCAM AWARENESS EDUCATION SERIES

How to Detect a Romance Scam?

How to tell if you are in an online romance scam, have you become a victim?

The internet has brought people together from all corners of the globe. But with this opportunity for connection comes a darker side: the rise of romance scams. These schemes often leave victims heartbroken and financially devastated.

So, how can you protect yourself? Knowing the red flags of a romance scam is your first and best defense. If you’re questioning a new online relationship, pay close attention to these warning signs.

The “Too Good to Be True” Person You Just Met Online

Romance scammers are masters of manipulation. They create online profiles and personas that seem almost too perfect.  (Hint: Do you feel like they can read what’s in your heart?)

• Undying Love in Two Weeks: They quickly declare intense feelings of love and devotion, often within days or weeks of meeting online. They’ll tell you you’re their soulmate, their destiny, their everything. This rapid escalation of intimacy especially since you’ve never met, is a major red flag.

• Picture Perfect, Details Murky: Their profile picture might be stunning, often featuring an attractive individual in a professional setting. However, when you dig deeper, their life story might be vague or inconsistent.  When things don’t add up, it’s because they don’t really add up!

• Exotic Location, Convenient Excuses: Scammers often claim to be working overseas (oil rig, military, international business) or have demanding jobs that make in-person meetings difficult or impossible. This provides a convenient excuse for why they can’t meet you.  It’s a leap of faith to trust someone without ever having met them.

 More Red Flags

The way your online love interest communicates can reveal a lot.

• Refusal to Video Chat: This is one of the most obvious red flags. Scammers almost always have an excuse for why they can’t video chat (broken camera, bad internet connection, security reasons).  You want to be able to see your new friend and speak with them live, even if through a camera.

• Constant Compliments and Love Bombs: Compliments are nice, but a constant flow of praise, especially very early on in a relationship, can set off warning bells of authenticity.

The Inevitable Request for Money

This is the ultimate “tell”, the moment the scam usually reveals its true colors.

• Emergencies and Hardship Stories: Eventually, a crisis will arise. It could be a medical emergency for them or a family member, business troubles, travel expenses, a visa issue, or even needing money to get out of jail. The stories are always urgent and designed to tug at your heartstrings.  Any online relationship that pivots from chat to money transfer, is usually when the scam has begun.

• Specific Payment Methods: They will almost always ask for money through wire transfers, gift cards, or even cryptocurrency.  These methods are more difficult to trace and nearly impossible to recover once sent. They will pressure you to send money quickly.  (Gift Cards, C’mon!)

• Additional Requests for Money: The initial requests might be small, to test your willingness to give, but they will eventually increase in amount until you’ve drained your bank.

Your Gut Feeling

Don’t underestimate your intuition. If something feels off, it probably is.

• Too Fast, Too Soon: If the relationship is progressing at an unusually rapid pace, and you feel pressured into a level of intimacy you’re not comfortable with, take a step back.

• Unequal Effort: Are you putting in all the effort to communicate, or are they constantly unavailable or making excuses?

• Money Tied to Relationship: If your willingness to send money is what keeps your friendship going, it’s time to walk away.

What to Do If You Suspect a Romance Scam

1. Stop All Communication: Immediately cut off contact with the suspected scammer.

2. Do Not Send Any More Money: Under no circumstances should you send any more funds.

3. Save All Correspondence: Keep copies of emails, chat logs, and any other communication.

4. Report It:

   • Internet Crime Complaint Center (IC3): If you are in the U.S., file a report at www.ic3.gov

   • Your Bank/Financial Institutions: If you have sent money, contact your bank or the institution you used to send the funds immediately.

   • Social Media Platform: Report their profile to the platform where you met them.

5. Talk to Someone You Trust: Share your experience with a friend, family member, or a support group. You are not alone, and there is no shame in being a victim of a scam.

Stay smart, stay safe, and always trust your instincts.

Contact us if you’d like more information on how cyber intelligence can help you locate a romance scammer.

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