SCAM AWARENESS EDUCATION SERIES

Almost every romance scam follows a predictable playbook. Once you know the script, you can spot the actor behind the mask.

Here’s how scammers operate—and how you (or someone you care about) can catch them early.

1. Recognize the Red Flags (The Early Warning System)

• Too perfect, too fast They fall in love within days or weeks, using intense affection bombing (“I’ve never felt this way before,” “You’re my soulmate”).
• Military, oil rig, or overseas contractor job Classic excuses for why they can’t meet in person or video chat (“I’m deployed,” “No signal on the rig,” “My webcam is broken”).
• Profile photos look modeled or stolen Do a reverse-image search with Google Images, TinEye, or PimEyes. Real people rarely have professional studio shots as their only photos.
• Inconsistent details or disappearing posts Their stories change (rank, location, children’s ages). Old social media posts vanish when you start asking questions.
• They avoid video calls at all costs

• Excuses range from “bad connection” to “camera broken” to “I’m shy.” After weeks or months, this is a massive red flag.
• Grammar and phrasing quirks Many scammers operate from West Africa or Eastern Europe. Look for  run-on sentences, or West African colloquialisms (“my late wife,” “I am into you,” “real love of my life”).

2. Test Them Early (Force Their Hand)

• Ask for a live video call with a specific gesture Example: “Let’s hop on WhatsApp video right now—hold up three fingers and say my name.” A real person will do it. A scammer will panic and make excuses.
• Suggest meeting in person Even if they claim to be overseas, say, “Great! I’ll book a ticket to visit you next month.” Watch them backpedal with emergencies (sick relative, lost passport, customs holding their luggage).
• Send a clearly reverse-searchable photo Take a selfie holding a piece of paper with today’s date and a random phrase. Ask them to do the same. Scammers using stolen photos can’t comply.
• Google their exact phrases Copy romantic messages verbatim into Google in quotes. You’ll often find the exact same text sent to dozens of victims on scam-reporting sites.

3. Watch the Money Trail (This Is How They Close the Deal)

Romance scammers almost never ask for money on the first day. They build trust first. Common money requests:

• “Emergency” medical bills for them or a child
• Plane ticket to come see you (but they’ll disappear after payment)
• Customs fees to release inheritance/gold/packages
• Investment opportunities (crypto, gold, oil deals)
• Phone or laptop repair so they can “keep talking to you”

Pro tip: Once money is requested, the scam is confirmed 99.9% of the time.

Legitimate people in genuine relationships do not ask someone they’ve never met in person for thousands of dollars.

4. What to Do If You Suspect You’re Being Targeted

1. Stop all communication immediately.
2. Do NOT send money under any circumstances.
3. Save everything: messages, photos, emails, payment receipts.
4. Report them:
   
   • FTC.gov/complaint
   • IC3.gov (FBI Internet Crime Complaint Center)
   • The dating platform where you met
   • If money was sent via Western Union, MoneyGram, gift cards, or crypto—report it immediately (some recoveries are possible if fast).

Bottom Line

Real love has a different pace, survives video calls, and doesn’t require you to pay customs fees for gold bars. If something feels “off,” it almost certainly is.

Trust actions, not words. Verify early, and you’ll never have to recover from a broken heart—and an empty bank account.

Stay sharp. Love shouldn’t cost you your life savings.

If you think you’ve already been scammed, you’re not stupid—you were targeted by professionals.  You’re not alone, and many people get through this.

Contact us if you’d like more information on how cyber intelligence can help you locate scammers.

Please share this guide with friends and colleagues.